Fighting Feelings of Overwhelm with an Attitude Shift

Earlier this year, I was working late into the evening, which seemed to be the only time I could actually fit in solid work. My brain felt scattered, and I was having a terrible time focusing. I have so many things to do, and yet the time available for working just seems to keep shrinking (working from home with two young children will do that). Reflecting on this thought, I could feel the stress level rising in my body. I felt myself tighten up, and my mind started on a loop: "this is stupid, you need to cut things out, you need more time, I can’t do this, there’s just not enough time, why did you ever think you could do this, you can’t run a business like this, you’re going to fail".

I’ve been down this road plenty of times, even before having two kids. This cycle is self-fulfilling. Every little distraction or disturbance becomes justification for letting the overwhelmed feelings rise up. Everything gets under my skin. I lash out in anger at those around me, blaming them for my lack of focus. Of course, the problem is with me rather than anyone else. All I am doing is guaranteeing that I don’t have enough time, since I’m spending all of my time being angry instead of focusing on what I can accomplish.

After I read Steven Pressfield’s The War of Art, I realized that this is simply Resistance rearing its ugly head. Now I had a name for the internal demon that prevented me from sitting down and doing the work. Even after knowing the name and behavior of my enemy for years, I still found myself wrapped up in the power of Resistance. Rather than face the fears and overwhelming feelings preventing me from completing my tasks, I gave in and used Resistance as a convenient excuse for not finishing.

But this moment was different. I managed to stop the loop thanks to a sudden flash of insight:

Rather than feeling overwhelmed and stressed out by how much there is to do and how little time I have to work, I could adopt the opposite attitude instead: I can do it all.

When this thought floated through my head, I instantly felt calmer. It didn’t matter that my to-do list and working hours hadn’t changed one bit. I merely looked at the situation with a different attitude (one that I truly believed in that moment). This instantly reduced my anxiety. I figured that even that singular benefit was worth the change in my default mental stance.

This attitude shift required practice. I kept repeating that phrase to myself. I wrote in my journal about how I could do it all. What I found after a few weeks was that this attitude shift actually worked. I am better able to confidently and continually work without the drama I’d been experiencing internally. My brain started thinking about the ways everything could fit. I found myself working in smaller iterations on everything, which allowed me to make progress every day, no matter how small. Sure, some things still don’t get done – but they will get done eventually! And somehow, with only 3–4 solid working hours a day, I’m producing more than when I was working 8–10 hours.

The problem with any perspective change like this is that we have to actually believe it and practice it. I’m not sure why or how to trigger this change in others. I certainly can’t convince you that it’s true: you have to have the realization for yourself. But it’s worked wonders for me thus far.

Further Reading

  • The War of Art by Steven Pressfield – essential reading for any creative person or entrepreneur who wants to understand those crazy feelings that pop up and prevent them from doing the work

3 Replies to “Fighting Feelings of Overwhelm with an Attitude Shift”

  1. That’s true Philip. I have been going through a similar thing with work and I feel that I let some part of me dictates how to create seemingly valid reasons for incorrect things like procrastination. As you mentioned, it just takes that little bit of self introspection followed by self awareness to drive you to make the change. Cheering for you and others who read and feel the same way.

  2. Thanks for being so open with your thoughts, Phillip! I can definitely relate; I feel like the story of the last few years of my life has been about managing the expectations I place on myself and finding a way to be productive without burning out or neglecting my family.

    Interestingly, my path through this has been to tell myself, “I can’t do it all.” I’ve had to admit that (1) my mind and body need rest to function at their peak, (2) I have a limited amount of time and energy to expend every day, and (3) there are other things I want to do with my life than just work. My struggle has been actually prioritizing the things that are important to me, giving myself room to pursue those priorities (in order, roughly), and then to be okay if I get to the end of the day and haven’t accomplished all of them.

    A pair of books that have really helped me improve my productivity and find more peace in my pursuits are “Peak Performance” and “Passion Paradox”. Highly recommend. The authors also have a website with articles and blog posts called GrowthEquation.com (I think that’s right).

  3. Your thoughts on this subject really hit home with me….I’m going to adopt the “I can do it all” attitude this week and see how it goes! Thanks for sharing!

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